Sublime

But married people make each other practice saving, investment, and delayed gratification. Nothing can mature character like marriage.

We subject everyone to the same intense scrutiny: is this someone who will nurture me and help me recover my lost self? When we meet someone who appears to meet these needs, the old brain registers instant interest.

We marry our unfinished business.

After marriage, we revert to being the people we were before we “fell in love.” Our actions are influenced by the model of our parents; our own personality; our perceptions of love; our emotions, needs, and desires.

When decent people with compatible values spend a life together and build something that is good and greater than themselves, they usually wind up loving one another deeply and enhancing each other’s sense of safety, contentment, and trust.

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The relationship began to shift when Karl came to see Danita as a “gift” whom he invited into his life to help him clean out his old issues around his fear of angry and critical people.