Sublime

Then I warn him. “Your wife is telling you the truth. She doesn’t feel safe knowing she can push you around. She wants to know that you will stand up to her. That is how she will feel secure in the relationship. But, here’s the catch. She has to test to see if she can trust you. The first time you set a boundary with her she may react intensely. Sh

could also be depression. It could be resentment of authority. It could be unwillingness to settle down and have a career. It could be carelessness with money. And it doesn’t have to be a psychological problem. It could be lack of education. It could be premature ejaculation. It could be anything that drives you crazy and makes you think if only he

Even if our childhood needs were met, we may need to work on ourselves as adults. Nurturant parents make sure our childhood environment is safe and soothing, and as adults, we may keep looking for the people or things that can recreate that miracle. The recurrent fantasy of, or search for, the “perfect partner” is a strong signal from our psyche th

Marcie began to see that this pattern with her new boyfriend was, in fact, a common pattern with anyone from whom she desired love. She could see that her underlying belief was, “Love is not to be trusted. I must work very hard to get love, and, even then, probably I won’t be loved. But at least I can keep trying, which keeps me in control. As long

All the experts I spoke to said that shared

And if you stick hard and fast to your Five Non-Negotiables, you will never have

find the place in you that wants to feel her needs and desires every day, or let her go so she can find someone who wants to offer her that gift.