By the time Chris reached dating age he was starving for affection and latched onto the most damaged girl at his school who verbally and psychologically abused him. When she cheated on him, Chris rationalized her behavior as his own fault and worked harder to earn her approval.

it’s not a good idea to get into deep, emotionally charged conversations too quickly. It instigates false bonding and will cause you to overlook many other glaring flaws, simply because you have this one, very important issue in common.

For example, in my beginning relationships I always went too far and wanted too much. If I met a girl and we hit it off, I immediately began talking about her in terms of marriage—even after one date! Once she was in love with me, I expected her to take care of me like a mother. Needy children need parents, so adult children turn lovers into parent

They become rescuers. They give in to their impulse to save the person from suffering. They call the boss and tell them their spouse was sick when he or she was drunk. They lend more money when they shouldn’t. They hold up the entire dinner for the latecomer, instead of going ahead with the meal. Rescuing someone is not loving them. God’s love lets