Raising Thoughtful & Curious Kids

“Oliver, came in to ask for screen time. Instead of saying the usual ‘no’, I stopped writing and asked if I could play with him.” — Don’t say “no” to screen time without offering playtime.

Incredible article about the state of the digital world and the necessity for kids to know who they are in the world.

What would a healthy culture and caring parents do for those kids? They would be pulled aside and told: you are you, and you will always be you; we live here, on this planet, in this culture, as this species; you live in the times you live in, and you will never live anywhere else. There’s no escape, for any of us. The world gets better and it gets worse. Your life gets easier and it gets harder. Progress happens. Happiness is possible. But the world is an irredeemably broken place, tragedy is the endowment of our bodies and our gods and our world, and you will always, always, always be you. You can hide in your room, but you’ll still be you. And you’ll still be you when you head off to college and make brand new friends, and you’ll still be you after you come out to your parents, and you’ll still be you after you get that job or that promotion or that raise, and you’ll still be you after you lose those last 10 pounds, and you’ll still be you after you fall in love, and you’ll still be you after the AI revolution or the socialist revolution or the love revolution or any other revolution. The only sensible path forward is to learn to accept the brokenness of human life, to develop resilience in the face of its petty cruelties, and to learn to live with yourself.

From the article:

• Engage them early in lively conversation.

• Play ​card, board or videogames that ​build​ working memory.

• Stress the intrinsic rewards of learning rather than grades.

• Frame a bad grade as a reason to work harder.

• Enroll them in schools where intelligence is seen as fluid rather than fixed.

• Teach them that their ability is under their control.

Famous science writer wrote this book while homeschooling his kids which has some beautiful lines in it that inspire learning science.

The feeling of the wind blowing is the feeling of molecules pushing against you.

The questions from the article:

1. “What did you learn today?” vs. “What did you disagree with today?”

2. “What did you accomplish this week?” vs. “What did you fail at this week?”

3. “Here’s how you do that.” vs. “How would you solve this problem?”

4. “Here’s your new kindergarten” vs. “What kindergarten do you want to attend?”

5. “That’s just the way it is.” vs. “Great question. Why don’t you figure out the answer?”

6. “You can’t do that.” vs. “What would it take to do that?”

7. “Did you make a new friend today?” vs. “How did you help someone today?”

Inspiring ability to make learning something difficult more rewarding. This man is a genius at making youth and learners feel great about failing.