The unspoken belief behind self-improvement is "I'll be worthy when..."
The unspoken belief behind self-improvement is "I'll be worthy when..."
For many of us, feelings of deficiency are right around the corner. It doesn’t take much--just hearing of someone else’s accomplishments, being criticized, getting into an argument, making a mistake at work--to make us feel that we are not okay. Beginning to understand how our lives have become ensnared in this trance of unworthiness is our first s... See more
Tara Brach • Radical Compassion: Learning to Love Yourself and Your World with the Practice of R.A.I.N.
Another important belief for rigid-patterned people is that you are what you do, that is, “you are your performance.” Your value is in your achievements, not in your being. You are
Steven Kessler • The 5 Personality Patterns: Your Guide to Understanding Yourself and Others and Developing Emotional Maturity
Caught in the trance of unworthiness, our desires fixate on soothing, once and for all, our anxiety about imperfection. We strive to tie up all the loose ends and to avoid making mistakes, even though we know both are impossible. We want to feel “good enough” all the time in our work, parenting, relationships, health, appearance, and life. We want
... See moreTara Brach • Radical Acceptance
You can choose to be worthy to yourself forever, and then get on with the task of working on your self-images.