The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever

But even if you know what you want, and you ask for what you want, and it seems to be heard, it’s often hard to hear the answer to your request, which might be not Yes but rather No. Or Maybe. Or Not that, but this instead. And on the other side of the conversation, it can be hard to understand that when someone makes a request, when she tells you

Make It Stick: The Science of Successful Learning by Peter Brown, Henry Roediger and Mark McDaniel. The authors are distinguished psychology professors, and together they’ve created a useful summary of the best strategies and tactics we have to help people learn.

Someone once said that everything tastes better with bacon. As a fallen vegetarian, I can attest to that. Equally, every question gets better when you add, “And what else?” Asking, “What’s the real challenge here for you?” Good. Adding, “And what else? What else is a real challenge here for you?” Even better.

The more direct version of “How can I help?” is “What do you want from me?”

This question will typically have the person focus on the one or two key takeaways from the conversation.

With every problem listed, you feel a little uptick of anxiety. Anxiety and satisfaction. Because with this many problems, you’re clearly in a position to help out in so many ways with a rich plethora of advice. The only question is where to start: with the first challenge mentioned, or with the one for which you’re most confident about providing t

Some of my favourite replies are: FANTASTIC. I LIKE IT. GOOD ONE. NICE. YES, THAT’S GOOD. MMM-HMMM

“How do I…?” or “What do you think I should do about…?” Seductive and dangerous,

When I’ve asked a question and she doesn’t have an answer ready within the first two seconds… INSTEAD OF… Filling up the space with another question or the same question just asked a new way or a suggestion or just pointless words… I WILL… Take a breath, stay open and keep quiet for another three seconds.