“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,” said Jung, “but by making the darkness conscious.”

Psychologist Carl Jung named these patterns ‘shadows’, perhaps because they pursue us wherever we go. Emotional shadow reactions broadly come in two forms — extroverted and introverted.

But when we look inside ourselves, we see the Shadow and we’re ashamed. Our immediate reaction is to turn away—to look outside ourselves for some evidence of our worth. This takes the form of looking to others for approval and validation.

In the process, we’ve turned something that was beautiful—the inner self—into something we despise: the Shadow. It may seem like the worst part of us, but really, it’s the doorway to the inner self. Only when that doorway is open can we truly express ourselves.