i think my son hates me

Children with this style show both a heightened need for closeness and an angry, rejecting quality. In the Strange Situation, a much-used research design, these children as one-year-olds are extremely distressed at being left by Mother but have a difficult time accepting her ministrations when she tries to patch things up.…

Some highlights have been

tried desperately to understand and know my mother—what made her sad, what made her happy, and on and on and on—at the expense of ever really knowing myself. Without Mom around, I don’t know what I want. I don’t know what I need. I don’t know who I am. And I certainly don’t know what to wish for. I lean forward and blow out the candles, wishless.

If you grew up experiencing emotional abandonment in childhood, it might make mothering more difficult.