I Owe You One: The Number One Sunday Times Bestseller

Because that way I feel like I’m in control of something, even if it’s just my own story.

shout at you and you don’t seem to care.’ ‘I guess I think about why I’m speaking,’ says Seb thoughtfully. ‘Who I’m speaking for. Who I represent. I’m speaking for people who don’t have a voice, and that inspires me. That powers me along.’

And I’ve got here early because … Well. Just to watch and enjoy.

I just feel kind of rueful. Because how much of my life have I spent comparing myself to Jake? And how utterly pointless was that?

I try to focus on a beach, but the only beach I can visualize is dry and scorching and kind of dystopian-looking, with blinding white sand and harsh cliffs and a vulture trying to peck bits out of my eyes while it screeches in my ear.

Poor legs. I send them a quick message, saying, Do this for me and we’ll have a hot bath later.

‘You forgive the person and you endlessly rationalize and you forget

But I think you need to start thinking less about what you owe other people and more about what you owe yourself.’

I watch silently as she starts filing my nails. The rhythmic action of her file is kind of mesmerizing and soothing. It’s reassuring. For both of us, I suspect.