Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power (A method for getting what you want by getting off on what you don't)

Hell yeah, I generated this! Hell yeah, a part of me fucking loves it and that part of me deserves to enjoy itself too, because every part of me is worthy and awesome, including the perverse shadowy parts!

But if you're bringing a “don't like” situation to mind in order to practice giving yourself deep permission to feel hot, nasty, electric joy about it, well then, that's quite a bit different, isn't it? Because in this later scenario, you aren't wallowing in negativity; you're wallowing in hot electric bliss.

Play a bigger, bolder game. Find a way to give sensation to others in exactly the way that you really want to give it to them. Let them feel your importance and significance in a manner that delights both you and them. Make it into a fine art. Consider the idea that all the best artists and the most inspiring leaders are masters of torture. They to

Two of the most popular TV series in the world at the time of me writing this book, for example, are Game of Thrones and The Walking Dead. Both shows feature big piles of violence, grief, pain, and horror. There are also heroines and heroes striving epically against all odds to survive and help others to survive as well. These shows are terrifying

and of course perception is shaped by our habitual (which is to say unconscious) attitude.

Dear Universe, I absolutely refuse to earn $10,000 a month . . .

In other words, if you lost your ability to feel bad, you might hardly recognize yourself. You'd be stepping into an unknown horizon. You might risk offending people in your life who expect you to feel bad and who believe that certain situations require feeling bad. None of this would actually kill you, but it would kill your old idea of who you ar

Finding and healing the unconscious, lack-obsessed part of you with deep erotic love (not weak-sauce “acceptance”) is the essence of Existential Kink.

the practice of Existential Kink is the work of becoming attuned to practical magic; you decide to fully incarnate, to agree fully to be who you already are, however messy or stinky that may be—with no reservation, no hold-back, no “if-only,” no judgment, no shame. And in dropping your resistance and negative judgment, you bring yourself fully into