Breaking Points

Of course, we rarely approach relationships with such wisdom. Instead, we spend years failing to fully commit to any one relationship—either by finding a reason to call things off as soon as a serious liaison starts to look likely or by only halfheartedly showing up for whatever relationship we’re in. Or, alternatively, in a pattern that every expe... See more

“You know when people always say, when they talk about the people they love most in their lives, ‘I would take a bullet for this person, I would walk through fire for this person’? That’s hurt. You’re saying, ‘I would hurt for this person.’ In a really profound and life-threatening way. ‘I would take a bullet. I would walk through fire.’ Infidelity

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Don’t make the relationship an end in itself that must be perpetuated at all costs. That will lead to demands for sacrifices in the name of “making our marriage work,” “keeping our friendship,” or “making the business succeed.” Relationships are only means to the ends desired by each of the people involved; when the ends are no longer served, the r

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And, as the brain is a social organ and hardwired to stay connected, it’s not necessarily prone to letting go easily of a primary attachment. In the brain’s world, better to have a negative bond than the existential death of no bond at all. And so, even if you know deep down inside that leaving is the right thing to do, even if you have five times

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