Belonging: A Review of Conceptual Issues, an Integrative Framework, and Directions for Future Research

Though it governs so much, belonging is rarely spoken about in the open. Like grief, death, and inadequacy, we are led to believe that to feel unbelonging is shameful and should be hidden from view.

Unlike fitting in, belonging had to be dynamic. This meant that exile and loneliness were equally vital on the path of true belonging. This became a core idea in the book. My old pattern of belonging had to dissolve and decay for a new, more sophisticated paradox to emerge.

“When one feels belonging, one feels accepted and seen, and when one is deprived of belonging, one feels rejected and invisible.”