The Power of Positive Self-Talk

When we see ourselves in this balanced way—with truth and grace—we can acknowledge our faults without either falling into a self-focused pit of shame or defending against seeing the truth of the situation. Before you start getting down on yourself for responding in unhealthy ways, you can talk to yourself with compassion: I think I sometimes do res

I am a nice person who’s had friends in the past. It hurts to not have many now, and that is a normal reaction. I think a lot of women feel the way I do. Over time my friendships changed as kids grew up, friends moved away, and I started attending a different church. This is a hard time for me and I’m going to be kind to myself rather than put myse

Research shows that self-criticism is strongly linked to depression, which is linked to a lack of resilience.3 People who are self-critical and depressed do not rebound well from the difficulties of life; instead they tend to be very self-focused as they try to survive their depression, anxiety, and the bully beating them up on the inside. Often wi

Self-compassion is different from self-esteem. Self-esteem is about assessing yourself in a positive way—often in comparison to others, which can lead to narcissism (feeling special or better than others). Self-compassion, on the other hand, is a gentle way we relate to ourselves when we’re struggling—with kindness, caring, empathy, and understandi

Here’s some truth you might say to yourself with grace: Dear Me, I know you are having a really hard time forgiving yourself for what happened. I know you’ve tried many times to say you are forgiven, but you haven’t felt forgiven. What this tells me is that you are really hurting inside about what you feel your part in this is. I’m here to tell you

When we have compassion toward ourselves, we will be able to tolerate and process our feelings in healthy ways. Studies show that self-compassion increases resilience and self-worth, aids in stress reduction, and helps us recover from painful experiences.1 These are key elements of emotional competency.

Self-compassion is a balance of truth (Yes, I made a mistake) with grace (I have worth and value, and I will address this mistake directly).

The relationship he has with himself impacts all the other relationships in his life whether he wants it to or not.

Sherrie also decided to talk to herself compassionately about the rough year she’d had and then come up with a plan to handle this recent news. This has been a tough year. I’ve had so much to handle and it seems like the tough times just keep coming. It feels like I can’t handle one more thing, but I know God and my family and friends will help me.