The Art of Community: Seven Principles for Belonging

Many leaders confuse self-selection (no invitation necessary) with “everyone belongs.”

values. The morals may be unidentified, seldom discussed, or unacknowledged, but you’ll see them clearly if you ask these questions: What and whom do we protect? What is intolerable? What do we share? With whom do we share? Whom do we respect? How do we show respect?

The shadow side of personal maximization is that it’s still a fundamentally selfish orientation. As soon as I think that cooperation doesn’t specifically benefit me, I’ll stop. This means that when things get tough or even unsure, cooperation is fragile. Most of us like to work with someone through hard times, hard conversations, and hard decisions

A boundary is the recognized demarcation between insiders (members) and outsiders. This boundary should be more about making the inside space safe for insiders than about keeping outsiders out. Where there’s a boundary, insiders feel more confident that they share values and that they understand one another better than outsiders.

We all want to know that we’re truly accepted into the communities we join. An initiation is any activity that’s understood as official recognition and welcome into the community. The initiation helps members understand clearly who’s part of the community. It marks the completed journey over the boundary and into the inner ring.

To create something that others want to join and support, we have to remember a core tenet: communities function best and are most durable when they’re helping members to be more successful in some way in a connected and dynamic world.

In this book, I define a community as a group of individuals who share a mutual concern for one another’s welfare. It’s distinct from a group whose members may share ideas, interests, proximity, or any number of things but lack concern for one another.

By maintaining outer ring and inner ring differences, visitors can feel confident that they’re in fact visiting without unintentionally becoming a member.

Who has the authority to reject someone from this community? Who can bring someone into the community on his or her say-so? Whose attendance makes a simple gathering more important or exciting? Who are the members to whom the rest of the community will (almost) always listen? Whose wisdom and insight is repeated within the community? Whose approval