Self-Therapy : A Step-by-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness Using IFS, A Cutting-Edge Psychotherapy, 3rd Edition

The most potent question to ask here is: “What are you afraid I would do if you didn’t (perform your role)?”

IFS doesn’t see us as having a disease or deficit. It recognizes that we have the resources within us to solve our problems, though these resources may be blocked because of unconscious reactions to events in the past. IFS is designed to be Self-led.

Exiles often take on the beliefs or the feeling tone of your family. If your family life was chaotic, you will probably have an exile who feels jumbled inside.

The Self is like the sun—it just shines.

Allow a visual image of the part to arise. This will give you the sense of it as a separate entity.

In beginning a session, you access a number of protectors and then choose one to focus on, called the target part. You inhabit Self and get to know this protector, finding out its positive intent for you. You establish a trusting relationship with the protector and understand what it is trying to protect you from. This sets the stage for further wo

You can ask the part to contain its feelings or to not flood you with them. You can ask the part to move out of your body. You could ask the part to move over and allow space for you to be there, too.

Here are the most basic and useful questions to ask a protector with examples of the protector’s answers in italics. • What do you hope to accomplish by playing this role? I want to make sure you only open up to people who are safe. • What are you afraid would happen if you didn’t do this? I’m afraid you would be betrayed. • What emotions are you a

The practice of Focusing[4] is an excellent method for allowing parts to gradually come into view.