I can’t even imagine her pain. It would be like a forest fire compared to my matchstick. But it also reminds me of something: everyone knows pain. It may come in different forms or at different times. But it comes. It’s a fundamental part of the human experience.

Everyone’s got scars. Whether outside or inside, they’re there. Focusing on mine keeps me in darkness. It rewires old patterns. I think of Wayne Dyer only thinking about what he wanted to create. That’s focusing on the light.

What we believe, that’s what we seek, it’s the filter we view our lives through. I’ve actively thrown myself at intense and difficult situations. All situations where I grew, but at what price?

The key, at least for me, has been to let go. Let go of the ego, let go of attachments, let go of who I think I should be, who others think I should be. And as I do that, the real me emerges, far far better than the Kamal I projected to the world. There is a strength in this vulnerability that cannot be described, only experienced.

Do you achieve perfection? Not if you’re human. But you are vastly better than before. How do you know for sure? Simple, just observe your thoughts. And since your thoughts determine your destiny, your reality shifts to reflect them.

But what if rather than as a means to an end, loving myself is the end?

That’s the thing about loving yourself, you start to tolerate less what doesn’t serve you—especially from yourself. This alone changes your life.

Look, life is short enough. We are but a brief flash of light, and then we’re gone. During our time here, we only have one job: to shine brilliantly. I say that because you exist, you must shine.

Sometimes, loving ourselves can be the hardest thing to do. Especially if we’re caught up in suffering. If you find yourself there, tell yourself this: Life loves me.