The plans, the movements, the crusades — none of these things has worked. And so the unfree person continues to dream, to condemn, and to remain where he is. There must be a better way.

Always try to determine the self-interest of anyone you deal with. And the best way to discover that is to ask him. What does he need?

Personal morality is an attempt to consider all the relevant consequences of your actions. “Relevant” means those consequences that will affect you. How your actions affect others is only important insofar as that, in turn, affects you.

In fact, it’s a very easy way to jump into a box. When you’ve lied about something, your actions are restricted by the need to maintain the fiction you’ve created. You can no longer react freely and spontaneously to new developments; you always have to keep your guard up to avoid doing anything that might reveal your previous acts. Ironically, I th

Such things are the rule because individuals are usually squarely in the Emotional Trap at the time important long-term decisions are made. Their “romantic” notions discourage them from wanting to think of what the relationship might be like a few years hence if handled in the normal ways.

Only when an individual gives up something he has in an exchange can you know how much he values the thing he says he desires.

The next time you daydream, imagine that you’re free to actually live the experience you’re fantasizing — totally free of all commitments, obligations, and boxes. Don’t try to figure out how you’ll remove the restrictions; just imagine that they’re already gone.

Desires are limitless; resources are limited. These two conditions are the reasons that individuals must make choices. Individuals decide how they’ll use their limited resources to satisfy their strongest desires. In doing so, they develop value scales, which we can see only by looking at the exchanges they’re willing to make.

A direct alternative is one that requires only direct action by yourself to get a desired result. An indirect alternative requires that you act to make someone else do what is necessary to achieve your objective. Once you’ve seen the positions and attitudes of the other people involved, a direct alternative requires only that you make a decision; a