when we switch from first person to either second or third person, we are putting distance between what’s occurring and our response to it. This doesn’t just apply to our inner dialogue, but journaling using second or third person can also help us process our emotions.

the idea that we can weaken the bond between sensation and our response goes back millennia.

simple (sensations) and the complex (emotions) leads to better decision making and ultimately toughness. Situations that require toughness are those that involve a high level of stress, pressure, or adversity. Such conditions are prime for misreading and misattributing our feelings and emotions.

self-determination theory, the level of autonomy, or “the desire to be causal agents of one’s own life,” is intricately tied to our well-being.

“Healthy adaptation is the result of flexibly choosing between regulation strategies to adapt to differing situational demands.” It’s not that distraction, suppression, reappraisal, detachment, or shifting to a broad or narrow worldview is good or bad. They all work—and don’t. TOUGHNESS

We can change the dialogue in productive ways or distance ourselves from the emotional response that might come from the more debilitative voices.

In order to trust, we first must be vulnerable.

‘Here’s what I’m capable of. Here’s what the race demands. I’m going to execute based on those two things.’ Those are the ones who consistently perform.”

We often equate toughness with persistence, but in some cases, it’s the exact opposite. Toughness is navigating the inner turmoil in order to make a good decision. Sometimes that’s to persist. Other times it’s to quit.