Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom

The effort to maintain separations is at odds with the myriad ways you’re actually connected with the world and dependent upon it. As a result, you may feel subtly isolated, alienated, overwhelmed, or as if you’re in a struggle with the world.

Consider how much time you spend thinking—in even the subtlest way, in the back of the simulator—about what others think of you. Be mindful of doing things to get admiration and praise. Try to focus instead on just doing the best you can. Think about virtue, benevolence, and wisdom: if you sincerely keep trying to come from these, that’s about all

So sense down into the youngest, most vulnerable, most emotionally charged layers of your mind, and feel around for the tip of the root of whatever is bothering you. With a little practice and self-understanding, you’ll develop a short list of “usual suspects”—the deep sources of your recurring upsets—and you’ll start routinely considering them if

Separate what is actually connected, in order to create a boundary between itself and the world Stabilize what keeps changing, in order to maintain its internal systems within tight ranges Hold onto fleeting pleasures and escape inevitable pains, in order to approach opportunities and avoid threats

When you do have lunch, a part of your brain called the cingulate cortex (about the size of your finger, on the interior edge of each hemisphere) tracks whether the rewards you expected—fun with your friend, good food—actually arrive (Eisenberger and Lieberman 2004). If they do, dopamine levels stay steady. But if you’re disappointed—maybe your fri

if getting upset about something unpleasant is like being bitten by a snake, grasping for what’s pleasant is like grabbing the snake’s tail; sooner or later, it will still bite you.

Parasympathetic activation is the normal resting state of your body, brain, and mind.

Negative experiences create vicious cycles by making you pessimistic, overreactive, and inclined to go negative yourself.

When you stimulate the parasympathetic wing of the ANS, calming, soothing, healing ripples spread through your body, brain, and mind.