Boundaries: When To Say Yes, How to Say No: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life

“You have not because you ask not.” And the Bible adds “because you work not.”

Welcome consequences as a teacher. Learning about sowing and reaping is valuable. It teaches us that we suffer losses when we aren’t responsible. The impulsive overeater has medical and social difficulties. The overspender faces bankruptcy court. The chronically late person misses plane flights and important meetings, and loses friendships. The pro

You need to make sure you are meeting your needs for support and emotional repair outside of work.

When the wife begins to set clear boundaries, the lack of Christlikeness in a controlling husband becomes evident because the wife is no longer enabling his immature behavior. She is confronting the truth and setting biblical limits on hurtful behavior. Often, when the wife sets boundaries, the husband begins to grow up.

“You know,” I said, “I’m asking you about friendships, and you’re answering about ministries. They’re not the same thing.” She had never considered the difference. Her concept of friendship was to find people with needs and throw herself into a relationship with them. She didn’t know how to ask for things for herself.

These spouses all need to let the out-of-control spouses suffer the consequences of their actions.

The problem arises when someone wants the job to provide what her parents did not provide for her: primary nurturing, relationship, self-esteem, and approval.

They become rescuers. They give in to their impulse to save the person from suffering. They call the boss and tell them their spouse was sick when he or she was drunk. They lend more money when they shouldn’t. They hold up the entire dinner for the latecomer, instead of going ahead with the meal. Rescuing someone is not loving them. God’s love lets

Others’ expectations can be very strong influences. You must make sure that your boundaries are strong enough that you do not let others define you. Instead, work with God to find out who you really are and what kind of work you are made for.