A Therapeutic Journey: Lessons from The School of Life

They seem, remarkably, to love us in and of ourselves, for who we are rather than anything we do. They hold a loving mirror to us and help us to tolerate the reflection.

miraculous: that they could be loved without prizes, that true love isn’t about impressing or intimidating someone, that an adult can love another adult a little like a good parent loves their child: not because of anything they have done, but simply and poignantly just because they exist.

Small household tasks offer us a metaphor for the sort of fixing we’re interested in but can’t yet quite manage inside ourselves. They give us the courage to imagine a day when we might be as tidy inside our minds as the linen cupboard outside currently is—thanks to what we did all afternoon.

There is no risk of spoiling anyone by doing so: Spoilt people are those who were denied love, not those who had their fill of it.

offers us an unparalleled chance to impress those who do not, or did not, originally believe in us. It is the favored tool of all those who start in life with a feeling of being under-loved, under-appreciated, and overlooked. It is the instrument of vengeance of the once-ignored. Under the guise of a merely practical pursuit, it carries a heavy emo

A well-functioning mind recognizes the futility and cruelty of constantly finding fault with its own nature.

The loving companion doesn’t get bored of instilling the same fundamental message: I am here for you and it will be OK.

A healthy mind avoids catastrophic imaginings: It knows that there are broad and stable stone steps, not a steep and slippery incline, between itself and disaster.

need you to accept—often and readily—the possibility that you might be at fault, without this feeling to you like the end of the world. You have to allow that I can have a legitimate criticism and still love you. I need you to be undefensive. I need you to own up to what you are embarrassed or awkward about in yourself. I need you to know how to ac